The Calm After the Storm

As we reach the end of our third month together,  I can finally find the time to sit down(in intervals though) and record some of my thoughts. 

Nothing could’ve prepared us for how things would be once our baby arrived. Not to mention how we were all still new at everything, including being married πŸ˜ƒ.We had made all these plans for our family before our baby arrived but little did we know how absolutely life changing his arrival would be, how much the time would fly by and how much love a person could feel.

I’ve heard the phrase “4th trimester” being tossed around referring to the first 3 months with your baby and I fully understand why that reference is appropriate. I felt like I was still pregnant, I still have my baby pooch, still tired as hell, still suffering from pregnancy brain,not getting enough sleep, the only difference was that my baby was on the outside and I now had the duty of feeding him on a highly demanding schedule. 

 The first 3 months with Aidan have been full of growth, personally, as mom and as a wife.Once the pains from the c-section dialed down (which took approximately 2 weeks) I started to get into the grove of things. I was also starting to get the hang of the breastfeeding gig at this time so we were all set to go.

Our biggest worry in the beginning was Aidan’s umbilical cord stump which was hanging on for dear life when it was long overdue, it just wasn’t drying up fast enough even though we were religious with the surgical spirit. We feared that it could become infected if it stayed longer. But the his pediatrician prescribed a different ointment to help and it fell off on the 17th day πŸ˜“πŸ˜Œ

Welcoming our little one to our home has been a wonderful rollercoaster.. I would like to touch on some of the emotions we went through during this time and how we grew from them and handled them.

It’s customary practice to have a female elder to be around you to assist you post birth, in my country. This is usually for 3 months. We were blessed with the presence of Aidans great grandmother who had been dying to meet him from the day I told her that we were pregnant. She arrived the day we came back from the hospital and was just the happiest granny in the world.

Now, my grandmother is a very old school gal and she believes in having people coming to visit  constantly, since she lives in a small community where everyone’s door is always open. Note that We were perfectly okay with people coming to visit us at first until we started having people coming over in masses all at once and we could no longer ensure that people were properly sanitized before interacting with Aidan( by the way I was super protective and obsessive about him, I believe that I have calmed down a little now πŸ˜‚) also our guests would bring small children around which would just add more to the chaos. This was definitely not part of what we had planned. 

By the time my husband went back to work, it felt like we were being robbed of our time together. He would be up early and back in the late afternoon,we’d both be tired so we’d pass out whilst trying to catch up, by the time the weekend came we’d  have an army of people around and I’d have make sure that they were entertained πŸ˜” I was still healing from the surgery and since grandmom is in her late 70s with zero to no vision, I had to be up on my feet making sure that everyone was fed and that everything was okay. We would silently joke about how it would be more appropriate for visitors to come bearing food for us since we were the ones dealing with a new born. And honestly I still think that’s the best thing someone could bring for a family that’s welcoming a new addition. 

All of this was taking a toll on us both as we weren’t seeing each other as much as we wished nor was my husband seeing Aidan enough so we decided to sacrifice grandmom when Aidan was a month old in the hope that it would lead to some quality time for us and it didπŸ˜ŠπŸ’› we’ve had more time now to cuddle up in bed, just the three of us singing and playing with our little one. Yes, it was harder, but definitely worth it because we got to take turns waking up to feed or rock Aidan at night and his dad Skype calling us during the day to see him. He was(still is) definitely addicted to Aidan, he’d call us at every chance he got and rush home s soon as he could. I don’t know if there’s anything sexier than that..☺️

We were totally knackered all the time but extremely happy with it all.. sometimes we’d just stay up while Aidan slept just sitting there in total admiration of Gods work in our lives, he has brought us together and blessed us with our son. We spent the next 3 weeks in a beautiful chaos, 

My mom arrived in the forth week and it was so good to have her around. I could finally kick back and get some rest and having her around was exactly what we needed. My husband and I could just go out even if it was for a drive, together, bumping to our favorite jams, like the good old days πŸ˜„.. 

Now with her gone, Aidan and I have established our own vibe. A way to get through the day, which is mostly dependent on a schedule.. he enjoys taking walks with me and watching me do my make up or my hair.. I think he just finds me extremely entertaining, he’ll stare at me, curious as to what’s on my hair or my lips etc. He enjoys seeing the waves/curls in my wigs, the color of my lips. We’ve figured out a way for me to do my makeup while he just sits there and watches me. 

Not to say that everything has been perfect though, Aidan still has his days/nights of complete terrorism but during those times I’ll have his dad there ready to tag team with me all night till the little guy is calm. I stay inspired by him, how he’ll come back from a long day at the office and still want to be so involved with Aidan and when I think he’s done it all, he sneaks in a back rub for me ☺️

We’ve come to realize how fast everything has happened and how we haven’t had the time to enjoy any of it. I mean last year this time, we were just dating, unaware of what was to come. Life is truely an unpredictable and amazing thing. This month, Aidan’s 3rd month means a lot to us, it is this month that changed everything for us,when our lucky stars aligned,this is the month that Aidan was created, exactly a year ago. 

So now we celeberate this month in our lives as the month that God chose us to be Aidan’s parents. As we settle into our new life, our new world, as parents and partners for life, we are stronger than before, unified and ready for more life… 

This is us in September last yearπŸ’›

Mr, Mrs & Jnr Baliki September 2017

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I'm a young mom, recently married and going about life also trying to record most of my journey. It's complicated but so rewarding too.

9 thoughts on “The Calm After the Storm

  1. 😍😍the emotions just reading through thisπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. I went from envy to laughing(about the food part), which I feel applies to everyone, it should be made a rule. Everyone who visits must bring something to eat. But mostly pride, in you as a young woman, wife and mother. You’re doing the damn thing girl

    1. Thank you so much 😊 πŸ˜‚Most definitely!! Food must be a rule.. and good food too πŸ˜‹
      I am completely humbled by you and really appreciate all the kind words. They are super motivating. God blessπŸ™πŸ½

  2. This is a beutiful read… it hits home in many ways..shem… This is my second baby and it feels like my first, simply because I forgot about the growth spurts babies go through, and how bad the fatigue is.. being a young mother with all the support in the world especially from your partner is the best thing ever… and I’m always greafull..
    All the best to you and your Family.. πŸ˜™

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to read this πŸ’› congratulations on your new addition to your family. It must be exciting.
      Yes definitely support is key, those who have it are blessedπŸ™πŸ½

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